Mentor Moment: Frank Chikosi on Reframing Mindsets

Young people are constantly absorbing messages about who they are, what they are capable of, and what their future holds. Some of those messages expand what they believe is possible. Others can become limiting stories they begin to believe about themselves.

For Frank Chikosi, mentorship is an opportunity to help young people question those stories and see themselves differently. Sometimes that means offering a new perspective. Sometimes it means listening closely enough to understand the story they are carrying. Over time, Frank has seen how a shift in mindset can open new possibilities.

Rewriting the Story

When Frank first got to know one young man in his club, he noticed that the boy rarely answered questions or shared his thoughts during club sessions. Curious to understand why, Frank asked him to stay behind after one meeting.

“Here was a young man who had the whole world against him. His friends were always making fun of him, his classmates made a joke of him, and his teachers told him he was dull and wouldn’t make it in life. No one believed he could be anything.”

Frank began helping him see himself differently.

“I started working on his mindset, making him see himself as a person of value and not useless. It wasn’t long before, when questions were asked, his hand was among the others attempting to answer with confidence. He was taking the lead based on a renewed mindset.”

For Frank, the experience showed him what can happen when a young person encounters a message that challenges the one he has been hearing everywhere else.

“It took a different voice of a mentor to speak against the negativity in his world.”

Hearing the Story

Frank has also learned that sometimes the most important thing a mentor can do is listen.

“A club member came to confide in me about his situation at home and how bad it was. We had a long talk. Actually, I had a long listening session of the whole story.”

Frank realized that advice was not what the young person needed most.

“It was at that time I learned that listening heals. Sometimes people just want someone who cares enough to listen, and that lightens their heaviness at heart.”

What stayed with Frank was the smile the boy had at the end of their conversation.

“I can’t even recall giving much advice, but the boy had a smile after he finished his story. All he wanted was someone to talk to who cared to listen.”

For Frank, listening became another way of creating space for a young person to see that his story matters.

Writing Your Own Story

For Frank, both experiences point to the same possibility: young people can begin to see themselves beyond the labels, circumstances, and expectations that have shaped how they see their lives.

He wants the young people in his club to develop the confidence to imagine something different for themselves.

“I want my club members to carry a mindset of possibility, knowing they can be anything, anywhere, if they want to.”